RehabFAQs

my aunt is elderly and rehab isnt helping. what to do?

by Valentine Nader MD Published 2 years ago Updated 1 year ago

What can I do to help my elderly relatives care?

You may contact your ombudsman ( you find them by calling number that should be listed on the bulletin board at the center, if not then go to internet and look up your state ombudsman program and they will give you your representative). The ombudsman will represent your parent's interest and investigate with you and they will get followup for you.

What to do when an older parent refuses assisted living?

Most family caregivers and patients do not want or expect this move to happen. This guide can help you learn more about this transition. It can also help you make this move as smooth as it can be. Why Going Home May Not Be Possible During rehab, physical therapists and other staff members set initial (starting) treatment goals for patients.

Why does my grandma refuse to move to assisted living?

Ask questions to determine why an elder refuses help — then you can tailor a solution, Kane says. “Is it about a lack of privacy, fears about the cost of care, losing independence or having a stranger in the house?” says Kane. To build trust, listen with empathy, and validate rather than deny your loved one’s feelings. 4. Offer options

What should I do if my mother is going to rehab?

Feb 22, 2021 · Here are some things to do when an older parent refuses assisted living and caregiving services. How to Convince a Parent to Go to Assisted Living. Talk with siblings/family first. Discuss options ahead of time and make sure you’re on the same page. This will help minimize tension and disagreements. Don’t push. Avoid making parents feel forced.

How do you help an elderly person who won't help themselves?

Aging Parents Refusing Help: How to RespondEvaluate Your Parent's Situation. Before anything, take a look at your parent's living conditions, activities, and mental health. ... Focus On The Positives. ... Make It About You. ... Enlist Experts (If You Have To) ... Give Options. ... Start Small.8 Nov 2019

What do you do when an elderly relative refuses to care?

What To Do When Elderly Parents Refuse Help?Start Early. ... Getting Older Is Scary, So Be Understanding. ... Stand By Your Parents No Matter What. ... Give Your Parents Options. ... Create a List of Issues and Priorities. ... Take Your Time. ... Seek Expert Advice.

Can family members be held liable for allowing an elderly parent to live alone?

Can family members be held liable for allowing an elderly parent to live alone? It is very rare that a family member is held accountable if an elderly parent refuses help and chooses to live independently.3 Aug 2021

What to do if your relative is in hospital and needs full time care?

What to do if your relative is in hospital and needs full time...Make sure your relative is safe and properly assessed in hospital. ... Insist on an assessment for NHS Continuing Healthcare. ... Section 2 notice. ... Don't be pressured into a quick discharge from hospital. ... Delayed Discharges. ... Don't miss out!

What do you do if someone refuses personal care?

5 tips if a loved one is refusing personal careTalk to them about why they don't want personal care. ... Support them to make their own choices about their personal care. ... Make personal care as comfortable and dignified as possible. ... Help them with a routine. ... Go shopping with them.30 Dec 2021

Can an elderly person refuse care?

The truth is that a person who is of sound mind has the right to refuse medical treatment. If a senior is competent and capable of informed decision-making, they can manage their own health in any way they choose, so long as they do not pose an immediate threat to their community.

How can you tell when an elderly person can't live alone?

Here are some signs the your parent should not be living alone: They require help with activities of daily living (ADLs) They have experienced a significant weight loss recently. They suffer from a memory loss condition such as Alzheimer's disease.

Can Social Services put my mother in a home?

If you're thinking can social services put my mother in a home – don't worry. In most instances they will arrange a care assessment and if there is a strong preference to remain at home they can arrange for a carer to attend the person's home at regular intervals to provide them with the care they need.

When a parent refuses to go to a nursing home?

Get Legal Support If your loved one absolutely refuses assisted living but is in danger, you may need to get outside support. An elder care lawyer can help you review your options, advise you about seeking guardianship, or even refer you to a geriatric social worker who can help. Your loved one may be angry and hurt.

What if a carer becomes ill?

If you suddenly become unwell, for example you are taken to hospital, then tell staff there that you are a carer and that there is someone relying on your support. They may be able to help you get seen very quickly, or to call someone for you who can provide care until you return.29 Oct 2018

Can social services force elderly into care?

Paying for residential care is often cheaper than paying for someone to stay in their own home and receive care there. Therefore, social services or the council may be forced to put someone into a care home if it is the only financially feasible way to ensure they get the care they require.12 Feb 2021

What is an unsafe discharge?

Patients discharged with no home care plan, or kept in hospital due to poor coordination across services. Lack of integration and poor joint working between, for example, hospital and community health services can mean patients are discharged without the home support they need.20 Jun 2016

How to build trust with a home health aide?

Offer options. If possible, include your parent in interviews or in setting schedules when hiring in-home care, says Stehle. Let them choose certain days of the week or times of day to have a home health aide come.

Can you be at your parent's side all the time?

As long as a senior loved one is not in danger or endangering others, let them make their own choices, says Cohen. “You can’t be at your parent’s side all the time. Bad things can happen, and you can’t prevent them,” she says. “You need to accept limits on what you can accomplish and not feel guilty.”.

Why do elderly people refuse assisted living?

Elderly parents refuse assisted living and caregiving services because they feel like they no longer have freedom, independence, and options. Remember that giving them options will make them feel like their opinions still matter and that they are still an independent being. When setting appointments and schedules, why not let them choose their preferred date and time? If they still want to go for a walk and do their hobbies, explain to them that their caregivers will be their companions and not a medium of restriction.

Why is it important to calm down an elderly person?

Understanding that elderly refusing care is common is important for making progress with your loved one . You don’t have to tell straight in their faces that they are disabled.

What is the loss of self?

Cohen who wrote the book “The Loss of Self: A Family Resource for the Care of Alzheimer's Disease and Related Disorders” advised that one should try to understand a person's fear about getting old instead of persistently demanding them to move into an assisted living shelter or availing services from caregivers. The author said that seniors who show anger or dreadful changes in their behaviors are aware of their situations. However, they don't understand how and why they are suffering from certain bodily malfunctions, such as cognitive impairment. Due to that, they tend to believe that their loved ones, even their children, are incapable of understanding their troubles emotionally and physically.

How to help parents with assisted living?

Pain points can be conversation starters for how assisted living can help parents live more fully. Give them control. No parent wants to be told what to do. Instead, ask how they would recommend solving the problem. Ask about their priorities and give them choices.

How to neutralize a charged situation?

Sometimes a third party can neutralize a charged situation. Consider having a trusted physician, spiritual guide, or counselor talk with your loved one. Share your feelings. Parents love their kids and don’t want to be a burden. Share how it might be affecting you in a way they can empathize with without blaming them.

What to do if your parents don't love you?

If your parents don’t love the idea, they may find they prefer the independence of a community. Consult an elder care lawyer. If you have to make financial or health decisions, know your legal options for legal guardianship or power of attorney. Prioritize trust and love.

Can an elderly parent be a coping mechanism?

Yes, they have reached the peak of their lives and that makes them too proud to the point that they think they will be okay on their own. Barbara Krane who co-authored “Coping with Your Difficult Older Parent: A Guide for Stressed-Out Children” explained that how seniors stubbornly act is comparable to how adolescents struggle with their parents. There are a lot of coping mechanisms, such as yelling, walking-out, and throwing tantrums, that can be stressful for both parties. However, these should not be the reasons to give up on elderly parents refusing assisted living or caregiving services. Instead of forcing your father to stop driving, why not drive for him and just let him enjoy the ride? This way, he will realize that being dysfunctional in some aspects is not a completely bad thing.

What are the behaviors that can disrupt the daily lives of seniors and their caregivers?

Obsessive or Compulsive Behaviors . Saving tissues, worrying if it’s time to take their medications, constantly picking at their skin and hypochondria, are all types of obsessive behaviors that can disrupt the daily lives of seniors and their caregivers.

How to help a dementia patient who doesn't have control over their words?

As a caregiver, the best thing you can do is not take it personally. Focus on the positive, ignore the negative and take a break from caregiving as often as you can by finding respite care.

What does "they are driving me crazy" mean?

“They are driving me crazy!” This phrase is uttered (or screamed) by family members everywhere who are caring for elderly loved ones. Caregivers often deal with unusual, unruly and embarrassing behavior from their care recipients. The AgingCare.com Caregiver Forum is filled with stories of irrational elderly parents, personality changes, hallucinations and temper tantrums.

How to handle mental health issues?

How to Handle Symptoms of Mental Health Issues. Hallucinations and delusions in elders are serious warning signs of a physical or mental problem. Keep track of what your loved one is experiencing and when so you can discuss it with their doctor as soon as possible.

Why do elderly people pull their hair out?

Many family caregivers are pulling out their hair over their loved ones’ excessive spending habits. Some seniors rack up debt, gamble, or send money to charities and scammers, while others refuse to spend a single penny on things they actually need, such as medications, adult briefs and long-term care.

Why do seniors lash out at their caregivers?

Occasionally, seniors will lash out at the person who is making the biggest effort to ensure their happiness and well-being. Left unchecked, the anger and frustration described above can become so severe that it results in abuse of the caregiver.

What to do if someone is physically abused?

If physical abuse is the issue, then seek professional help. This may consist of a phone call to the police or adult protective services (APS), attending counselling, or permanently handing over your loved one’s care to a court-appointed guardian, professional caregivers or a long-term care facility.

When discharging elderly patients from hospital, what should be done?

When discharging elderly patients from hospital there are follow on steps that need to be considered and arranged. If the discharge is to a care home they should also be told the date and time, and have a copy of the care plan. Independent Age has more great advice for hospital stays and discharge.

How difficult is it to get a relative discharged?

The hospital discharge process explained. It can be very difficult to get your relative discharged from hospital, or you may discover they are about to be discharged and you feel totally unprepared for what needs to happen next. The hospital should tell you who is arranging your relative’s discharge and, if possible, ...

Why do families juggling children and jobs?

Families all over the world are juggling children, jobs and aging parents in an effort to "take care of their own." There can come a point, though, when the demands created by caring for an aging parent outweigh the logistical, financial or emotional resources available.

What happens if an older family member is no longer able to live?

If you notice signs that an older family member is no longer able (or seemingly interested) in living with a basic amount of dignity, socialization and contentment, that person may very well benefit from the care, attention and understanding that can be provided by care facilities.

What do family members have to do to help out?

Family members must take leave from jobs, drive great distances daily to help out, and take on the costs of the elder's mortgage, utilities and other bills. Then, there's the cost of home-care nurses, trips to the hospital, ambulance rides and other health-related expenses.

What age do you start showing symptoms of Alzheimer's?

A person still in their 30s or 40s may begin showing early symptoms of Alzheimer's, though it more commonly presents itself in those who are retirement age or older. In the early stages, a person has difficulty processing information, remembering simple items or tasks, and concentrating.

How does Alzheimer's affect memory?

Over time, those suffering from Alzheimer's will lose the ability to speak, walk and swallow. It is a progressive and fatal disease.

What are some tasks that older people can do in a nursing home?

These tasks include bathing, cooking, eating, changing clothes and getting safely into and out of the bathtub. For these people, assisted living may be the answer.

Can you help an Alzheimer's patient at home?

However, the challenges of caring for an Alzheimer's patient at home only multiply, so just when you think you can sufficiently help a loved one handle a certain level of disability, his or her needs increase. Professionals in care facilities are often equipped and trained to help residents with Alzheimer's.

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